I've been feeling pretty sad recently - inadequate, unappreciated, and my anxiety doesn't help. I know I am loved and far luckier than many - I really appreciate all the amazing people and opportunities in my life, but despite that, I always feel like a second choice, and despite any compliments, my flaws dominate and I just feel like I annoy everyone :( <3

work on that, i always felt like that too but every time you feel like that remind you that it is not true, don’t play yourself down so much and count all your flaws, people often see us completely different compared to how we see ourselves. i started group therapy which helped me a lot to learn about how other people see me and it gave me self confidence. don’t worry too much about how others see you or that you’re not somebody’s choice. it’s not always like that, a few people in your life will surprise you by thing you are the most brilliant and beautiful person walking this earth :D

So I really like this guy but I like him for his personality and like I don't really think he's cute. I feel shallow for say that but like I feel like if you are going to be with someone you should be attracted to them to. What should I do?

there is no shame and you are not shallow for saying that. yeah i think that too, but i also think that personality means a great deal more than looks but if there is no attraction to him and you feel like it’s not working for this way then tell him that or i don’t know how long you guys know each other but wait it out a little bit more and maybe you’ll fall for him? maybe the attraction comes later but please do not let it go on too long and get his hopes up that you guys are going to be something when you don’t feel as strongly as he does.

I was the previous anonymous, I really appreciate your response. Thank you. How did you become so knowledgeable about what to say? I feel like everything I say is the wrong thing to say but I still say it anyway. But are you ok? Anyone who can choose the right words to such difficult questions must have had their own fare share of difficulties.

i have no clue, i just say what i feel about the situation and how i would react. i can’t say if that is right or wrong :) have a little faith in yourself, i bet what you say is not wrong. and thank you for asking, i am actually pretty good. i had my fare share of difficulties for awhile, i am leaving them behind right now :)

Hi, I don't know if I should burden you with yet another case, but I just feel like I can't speak to anyone about how I feel, because I myself don't even believe that its genuine, if that makes any sense? Sometimes I feel like there is nothing about me which is worth getting to know, but at the same time I want to speak and get to know people but how can I when I feel that everything I say is just a facade? I dont want to create a problem out of nothing but I cant help it. Thank you for this x

well first of all you can always talk to me no matter when and second of all you got to stop thinking so little of yourself. of course there is lots of things worth knowing about you! i know it’s hard shaking that feeling that you’re not interesting enough to get know but almost everybody feels that way sometimes. i know it’s easy for me to say but you got to shake off those mean thoughts in your head that you’re boring or dumb or whatever. those thoughts will only hold you back, shake them off put yourself out there and i promise you, you will get shut down lots of times but the same amount of times you meet new interesting people, make friends, fall in love.

but don’t pretend to be somebody you’re not. you’re are worth so much more than that, you don’t need to be somebody you’re not. just you is enough, always :)

There is this guy and I'm completely in love with him. We have known each other for about four and a half years and we've always been flirty towards each other when we first met we started dating for a few weeks but we decided it would be better if we just stayed friends (mainly his decision but I didn't want him to know how I felt; I was scared) so anyway it's four years later and I'm still in love with him but he has a girlfriend. She is really nice and I don't want to hurt her but I love him

4 and a half years??! you gotta tell him or you’ll regret it for the rest of your life. life is way too short to deny the things you want. just tell him and then it is out of your hands but take a risk once in awhile, it’s worth it, i promise!! :)

so i think i am still in love with this guy, I don't know. we dated for the longest time, then broke up and kept seeing each other secretly. he is now dating someone else but he won't let go of me, keeps wanting to see me and cheats on the girl when i get back in town. we don't live in the same country anymore, both moved for uni. i don't know if i keep agreeing to this because i want him back or because I want his attention or what. i don't know what to do anymore , i miss him

figure out what you want, do you want him back because he reminds you of old times and makes you feel save or do you want to be with him? are you in love with the idea of you two or are you still in love with him? i can’t really tell what you want, so I would try to figure out if you’re stuck in the past on purpose because you want him or are you not really to let go of the past and move forward with your life? so in the end, is he the guy you can imagine building a life together and can you see a future for you two or not?

warst du schon mal bei einer Therapie? sorry, dass ich nicht aufhöre dich was zu fragen. Hab ich auch schon überlegt, aber wütte nicht zu wem und man muss ja immer so lange warten..

ist echt kein problem :) dafür ist der blog da! ja ich bin in therapie seit letzen oktober. ich hate schwere depressionen und selbstmordgedanken und war oft am ritzen also hat meine mutter mich zur therapie geschickt und es hat mich wirklich geholfen. am anfang hat es mir richtig angst gemacht, weil es so unbekannt war und weil ich nie mit jemanden wirklich über meine gefühle geredet habe und weil ich mich wie nen freak gefühlt habe, aber es hilft mir. also kann ich es nur empfehlen :) ich wusste nicht, dass man lange warte muss. irgenwie hatte ich direkt nen termin nachdem die meinen fragebogen gelesen habe :)

ich habe einen Freund... aber ich trau mich nicht mit ihm darüber zu sprechen, weil ich mich schäme, weil ich mir selbst wie ein "opfer" (behindertes Wort) vorkomme und ich nicht mich zu erniedrigen möchte. Abgesehen davon läuft es bei uns nicht mehr so gut... Ich weiß im Moment einfach nicht, was ich will. Bin mit der Schule fertig und joa. Mit meinen Freundinnen hab ich kaum noch was zu tun, warum auch immer. Ich hab einfach so gut wie niemanden mehr, der sich für mich interessiert. fuck.

oh ich bin auch gerade mit der schule fertig :) and mhh jeder fühlt sich im leben mehrmals glaub ich so wie du gerade und vielleicht läuft es im moment nicht gerade so gut, weil du dich immer mehr emotional von ihm entfernst? vielleicht hilft es ihm zu erzählen was los ist und gucken wie er reagiert? was ist mit deinen eltern oder vielleicht therapie? ich bin im moment auch richtig planlos, aber das im moment ist nur ein abschnitt von deinem leben und es geht wieder bergauf :) gib nur nicht auf!

hast du jemals das Gefühl gehabt, die Kontrolle über dein Leben zu verlieren? ich weiß einfach nicht mehr weiter.

was genau ist passiert, dass du das gefühl bekommen hast? ich glaub nicht das man beim leben die kontrolle behalten kann und das man lernen muss im chaos lernen zu schwimmen? mach das sinn? du kannst nicht die kontrolle behalten, weil das leben allein schon chaos ist und keinen sinn macht also sind alle erklärungsversuche und versuche die kontrolle zu behalten sinnlos. wenn du aber denkst, dass du nicht mehr alleine dein leben hinkriegst, hast du jemanden mit dem du darüber reden kannst? famile oder freunde? behalt es ja nicht alles für dich, sondern erzähl es jemanden. das hilft wirklich :)